If
dogs talked, one of them would be president by now. Everybody likes dogs.
Dean Koontz
There
are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.
Mae West
That
old law about "an eye for an eye" leaves everybody blind.
Martin Luther
King, Jr.
Sometimes
at the end of the day when I'm smiling and shaking hands, I want to kick them.
Richard Nixon
Being
president is like being a jackass in a hailstorm. There's nothing to do but to
stand there and take it.
Lyndon B. Johnson
We
are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.
Dan
Quayle
The
President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep.
George Stephanopoulos of Bill Clinton
You
do not lead by hitting people over the head. That's assault, not leadership.
Dwight D. Eisenhower
They
misunderestimated me.
George W. Bush
Ability
is nothing without opportunity.
Napoleon Bonaparte
One
of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up
being governed by your inferiors.
Plato
Once
a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast.
Marlene Dietrich
Happiness
is good health and a bad memory.
Ingrid Bergman
There
was a time when a fool and his money were soon parted, but now it happens to
everybody.
Adlai Stevenson
It
ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
William Clinton
When
the rich make war it's the poor that die.
Jean-Paul Sartre
The
road to Hell is paved with good intentions.
Karl Marx
I
think, therefore I'm single.
Liz Winston
Glory
is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
Napoleon Bonaparte
Everything
I did in my life that was worthwhile I caught hell for.
Earl Warren
Dew
knot trussed yore spell chequer two fined awl yore mistakes.
Brendan Hills
Pioneering
basically amounts to finding new and more horrible ways to die.
John W. Campbell
I
believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that
money can buy.
Steve Martin
Insignificant
events can take on monumental proportions when your head is full of practically
nothing.
Grace Slick
The
most valuable of all talents is never using two words when one will do.
Thomas Jefferson
What
this country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.
Will Rogers
One
Today is worth two Tomorrows.
Benjamin Franklin
I
saw the new Italian navy. Its boats have glass bottoms so they can see the old
Italian navy.
Peter Secchia, US Ambassador to Italy
We
have the power to do any damn fool thing we want to do, and we seem to do it
about every ten minutes.
Senator J. William Fulbright
Principles
have no real force except when one is well fed.
Mark Twain
Execute
every act of thy life as though it were thy last.
Marcus Aurelius
Dig
the well before you are thirsty.
Chinese Proverb
If
you want your children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility
on their shoulders.
Abigail Van Buren
It's
never too late to become what you might have been.
George Eliot
"Intern"
is French for "slave."
Bill Cosby
Food
is an important part of a balanced diet.
Fran Lebowitz
In
the case of many poets, the most important thing for them to do is to write as
little as possible.
T. S. Eliot
Love
is grand; divorce is a hundred grand.
Unknown
If
you lend someone 20 dollars and never see that person again, it's probably worth
it.
Sam Ewing
Where
boasting ends, there dignity begins.
Edward Young
You
can be young without money but you can't be old without it.
Tennessee Williams
I'd
rather be dead than singing "Satisfaction" when I'm forty-five.
Mick Jagger
What
happens if an asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations
involving a sledgehammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be
pretty bad.
Dave Barry
Everything
you can imagine is real.
Pablo Picasso
Don't
make me come down there. - God
Billboard
I
don't question your existence. - God
Billboard
School.
I need to be there. – God
Billboard
Be
nice, or I'll make the traffic worse. - God
Billboard
I'm
a polyatheist - there are many gods I don't believe in.
Dan Fouts
If
you can spend a perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you
have learned how to live.
Lin Yutang
When
a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him
sit on a hot stove for a minute-and it's longer than any hour. That's
relativity.
Albert Einstein
Since
the mathematicians have attacked the relativity theory, I myself no longer
understand it.
Albert Einstein
Each
of us visits this Earth involuntarily, and without an invitation. For me, it is
enough to wonder at the secrets.
Albert Einstein
The
greatest danger in communication is the illusion it has been achieved.
George Bernard Shaw
Unhappiness
is the ultimate form of self-indulgence.
Tom
Robbins
A
radical is a man with both feet planted firmly in the air.
Franklin D. Roosevelt
If
you think education is expensive, try ignorance.
Derek Bok
If
we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
Albert Einstein
Time
flies when you're on Prozac.
Bette Midler
At
50 everyone has the face he deserves.
George Orwell
I
gotta be me.
Sammy Davis, Jr.
So
it goes.
Kurt Vonnegut